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Dirtscapes

Read. Suffer. Try to Enjoy.

Just Like A Prayer

In a sublime show of the shinier sides of human emotion, the country recently witnessed a rash of this, this and this. Everywhere you looked, there was one news item guaranteed. About a certain Sunita's safe return to earth.

Which was incredibly sweet. Really.

Why? You might ask. Here goes nothing...


1) This evidently will inspire so many kids all over the country to become exactly like her. (The fact that barely 0.25% of them all would end up having access to the kind of education required to become her does come up. I don't know why.) Also, the poor org which has sent her up, doesn't quite know what it is in for. Give or take twenty odd years, they are gonna be flooded with so many astronauts from here, that they wouldn't know where in tarnation to send them. (That's the 'guidance' on the street anyways...)

2) The sight of cherubic angels praying, with (probably) absolutely no ****ing idea as to who she is, or what exactly she has done is an excellent example of childhood innocence and purity. They wouldn't even have heard of her, but thanks to the geniuses who thought this up as a fantastic expression of 'countryman solidarity' (with a cool photo-op of course. What were you thinking?), they got to pray for what they had been told to pray for. Which I'm guessing wasn't much in the first place to begin with...

3) Prayer can move mountains. And land shuttles safely.

4) She probably is a far bigger inspiration here, than back home. (An average American kid in the same age group would have no ****ing clue as to who she is. Just like ours you might say, but hey, at least they didn't have to 'pray for her safe return'.) Which is kind of awesome, considering that she is *part* Indian American (very important word) and part Slovenian. Now if only I could read Slovenian. Am sure they would done something similar over there too. Very sure.

5) The news channels got to dry hump themselves with the 'story' till they bathed in the afterglow, breath ragged, chests heaving, purring with delight (and we stop here. Sadly.).
With woebegone appeals on the lines of "Ab aa bhi jaao Sunita", "Laut chali Sunita", "Hamari Sunita", calculated to make you get that fuzzy warm feeling and send your SMS out.

6) For proving yet again, that we as a nation take our humour very seriously (that is a pretty cool sentence construct. Damn.).
Remember that dismembered, beaten-to-death joke which went something like this?

"3 guys Nationality 1 guy, Nationality 2 guy and an Indian guy are asked to build something. Nationality 1 guy builds a fantastic model, Nationality 2 guy tweaks and refines it further, the Indian sticks a label on to it stating 'Made in India'. "

A very versatile algorithm as you can see. You can apply it just about anywhere, to just about anyone. Including guys who run/ran for office somewhere in
Louisiana. And incredibly tuneless American Idol contestants, who don't have a ****ing clue as to what their first ("Indian" - important word. Again.) names mean, when asked on late night television shows.

Maybe we should include the guy who invented that joke in our daily prayers too. He deserves it as much as anyone on the planet.
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1:53 PM, June 25, 2007
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey tapan,
Sorry for "hijacking" your blog. I read in the papers that the rain gods are smiling a lot on mumbai. Hope you are safe. You probably should write about one of the biggest ironies that face the country. If it rains you get f*ked if it does'nt you get f*ked again too.

Raghu    



2:04 PM, June 25, 2007
Blogger Anand said...

happy looking new look for blog clubbed with cynical new post :))
Now, what do I make of that.

Did a recollection of the joke spawn this post?? :)) Nice jokes those.. x,y and Indian category :)) Keep writing brother..    



7:29 PM, June 27, 2007
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey,
Cynicism trickles throughout the post.. :) one paper/channel publishes 'feel good' story, the rest HAVE to jump on to the bandwagon!
New look is definitely easier on the eyes...but get the skull back..it was ze good! :)Though it suited the 'dark' black b'ground way better.
M.    



1:59 PM, June 28, 2007
Anonymous Anonymous said...

get the dark black look and feel back and yes ofcourse the skull...
tht was da best ......
melyaaaaaaaaaaa
do it .........    



11:21 PM, June 28, 2007
Blogger Tapan said...

Raghu,
Good to hear from you, where are you nowadays? Don't believe everything on the news. :) And yea, am just waiting for the monsoon to kick in here. Same old story every year...

Andy,
that is an interesting dichotomy... NOW that you mention it... happy blog, cynical post. Wow.

Anon 1/'M',
Done... (if it makes you happyyyyyyy....)

Anon 2,
The skull is back. But let the new happy look sink in for a while. I have a feeling black will be back soon too... :)    



9:57 PM, June 29, 2007
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That was quick...the skull definitely suits the 'dark' background more! But the white is a contrast to the posts put up by you...doesn't gel with the sarcastic scorpio, i say! :)
M    



5:14 PM, July 03, 2007
Blogger shamanth said...

awsome writin man...
the media gutter has always provided us with hilarious stuff. bless them!!!!    



11:12 PM, July 12, 2007
Blogger Tapan said...

Anon 2,
I will try to post happy stuff. Will try.

Shamanth,
Thanx. They sure do.    



6:44 PM, August 06, 2007
Anonymous Anonymous said...

jhakaas !
dont ever switch to black......i cant read, and i've got to read.    



12:54 PM, August 07, 2007
Blogger Tapan said...

Anon,
Relax. I like this layout too. :)    



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